HAPPY APRIL

      Hey everyone it’s a new month and one I’m particularly excited about, yes anyone who knows me well knows my birthday is this month, well come 25th April I’ll be turning 19 *dancing* yeeeeyyyyyyyyy. And for some reason I’m excited I hope this birthday would be different, oh and something else I decided this month to start volunteering *winks* lol many of you may not know why however those who follow me on twitter know this too well so if you have any event in Abuja and are in need of a volunteer I’m open and available biko contact me busayokehinde81@gmail.com ………
        Oh well sometime last month I struggled with continuing this blog or letting go of it, here’s why I had a little bit of trouble and it was like all I had spent all my life believing was a lie and I had already shared so much of all I had learnt on here so I was contemplating deleting the blog but I didn’t. after coming through depression recently I’ve decide to spend the next few post writing on depression and all I’ve learnt, now please note that this is not to replace professional counseling it’s just so you can actually evaluate things and get someone to talk things through.
        Oh well starting tomorrow I’ll be writing on depression, today Meshel is wishing you the best of the new month, more grace, more Joy, extraordinary peace and God’s protection. I ask that God would keep and lead you through this month and beyond and oh may his purpose for your life never be lost. Amen.
Love always
Busayo Kehinde

TOO FAR

Honestly today I’m typing by faith because I have nothing in my mind to put up here.. in the past week I had an experience that almost knocked the wind out of me, I’ve had to wrestle with God, I’ve doubted his word, I’ve judged people, I’ve looked at God and almost said I could do all I want on my own, but I couldn’t, and I kept wondering why, why couldn’t I just turn my back on God, why couldn’t I say God was unkind, why???? Honestly I don’t have a perfect answer except this “some of us have come too far to turn back on God, it’s not about what he has done or what he hasn’t, it’s not about what you have or what you don’t have, it’s not about what you see or what you don’t see, some of us have come too far to ever go back”
  It’s crazy, even Judas a disciple would turn his back so what makes me unable to turn my back on Jesus? Well; it’s the same thing that made Judas commit suicide, by faith I have a heart that cannot do without Jesus, it’s not about me anymore I’ve come too far to turn my back on my King.
In the meantime remember this “life would hurt day in day out, it would be a struggle to keep the faith and wait to see what the lord has planned…. But what other option is there but to die, for to have no hope is to die, I choose life, I choose to believe Gods word, I choose to believe in his presence and his promises, I choose to wait and see what the lord has planned”
Mish loves you all and always has a prayer said to heaven for y’all, thanks to everyone who took time to check up on me while I was away sorting out things, I’m always a message away busayokehinde81@gmail.com or bbm 55f5954a
Love
Busayo k

FOR ALL THE LOVE THAT NEVER CAME

This isn’t a typical post of mine but it’s one for the time, I dedicate this to the lost, the broken, the suicidal, and the crushed spirits, the ones who gave out love and expected same but never got the love they craved. For the love that never came, the vow someone broke, the heart that is shattered the life that has given up hope, I want you to know I’m thinking of you in this season while I go through a very challenging time emotionally and I think it so I’ll know how you feel, I’ve wanted to self harm the past few weeks and now I understand how people feel when they do that……… I want you to know that I care; I’ll be sending prayers to heaven for you….. I want you to know the most high is thinking of you and that’s why he has me do this so you’ll know you’re not alone in this…… if you need someone to share with, talk to, if you need a muse I’m always a message away busayokehinde81@gmail.com
Love
Busayo

LET GO 2

       Hello lovelies, I hope every one of you is doing well. Oh before I dive into today’s post I’ll like to tell you all about something I put myself up to, I recently joined the project Life guard on twitter, it’s a sort of help for people who are maybe depressed, discouraged, disappointed and the likes, or just those who feel like talking to somebody…. I spend time praying for them and then I ask God to lead the right people to me and I’ve been blessed by doing it……. I hear a lot of people say most of these struggles are “oyinbo” people’s problems well it’s not there’s so many black people who battle it and it’s such a joy applying all I’ve learnt through my life to reach out to others……… so you want to talk I’m just a mail away busayokehinde81@gmail.com , or join me on twitter @miss_kehinde and facebook Kehinde Busayo or follow on Instagram @miss_kehinde. Choose your pick I’m always available.
Oya back to the matter……. Let go! Last week I wrote a piece titled let go, there I wrote at length about letting go of people who have hurt you, messed with you and people who have generally caused you to make wrong generalization about life. Well I read through the post again and I realized I didn’t write something I should have and rater than just edit that post I decided to do another post, because a few people who have read the first one may not get to read it again and the message would be lost. Well what did I omit? I omitted the aspect of letting go of you. Yes letting go of you, some of you have possibly done very wrong things in the past and maybe years after its ruined stuff for you, you’re mad at yourself, you won’t forgive yourself because you are the cause of all that is going wrong in your life now. I keep saying this to as many people as I meet, it may have turned out to be a mistake but at the time it looked like it was the best you could do, please give yourself a margin of error you’ll make mistakes but you’ll learn from them, there is no such thing as expertise in life, we grow every day,  we learn daily, so yes maybe you did something that has brought calamity upon you well, you can’t undo your error, you can learn from it, some of us carry baggage name “YOU” let go of yourself, forgive yourself, you don’t have to punish yourself; yes some people punish themselves, deny themselves good friendships and relationships because they see themselves as evil, don’t label yourself there is nothing wrong with you. You’ve made the mistake the repercussion has come, you’ve learnt from it, you’ll do better next time, hug yourself and tell yourself “I’ll do better next time”….. Some of you are still mad at yourself today forgive yourself, love yourself…. Let go of yourself and let God work through that self.
Love
Busayo Kehinde
Always remember I’m always a message away………….. busayokehinde81@gmail.com

CONFRONT IT

At some point last year I started to put on too much weight, now weight gain in some sense may be a good sign, but in my own case it wasn’t, it got so bad that if I smiled you probably won’t be able to see my eyes, now  Yoruba women like my mom and her friends were very happy about it, they’ll pass comments like ahan I never knew you could even be this fat you look so fine oh” since very few people complained I kept up with what was making me so fat.
         Now here’s why I was putting on so much weight; I had a little bit of a situation, it wasn’t a naturally big problem but it was a very awkward and uncomfortable one for someone like me, I wouldn’t say what the problem was but I can say it was very minor and if I wasn’t so chicken it wouldn’t have cost me so much to confront it but I was too chicken so I had to work to forget the issue, I tried several things to get it out of my mind but I couldn’t seem to, until one night I tasted heaven, my “demon” (problem) crossed my mind again and while it was  trying to haunt me I got up and ate chocolate and biscuit and for the first time in a while I wasn’t thinking about my problem I was in ecstasy eating my chocolate and biscuit and by the time I was done eating that I was too tired so I drifted off to sleep, I had discovered a way to run from my problem, so whenever my demon arose I’ll eat, but the problem is the “demons” seemed more active at night so every night I’ll eat not less than 6 packs of biscuit and chocolate so I won’t have to face my “demons” I continued this way until one day; my dad decided to visit me at school he couldn’t hide his shock about how fat I had become, before he left he said;  “you had better find something to do about that fat swollen face oh, you don’t even know how you look”!! I almost cried. I told my friend about my fat situation and she told me that eating at night caused people to get fat, so I decided not to eat but to take sleeping pills at night. The first night was a total disaster, I couldn’t sleep I needed food. I grown from using food to cover my fracture to being addicted to mid night eating, I had to get up and eat, but I avoided anything really fattening, I just ate crackers and took orange juice.
    In the end I had three things to deal with first my main issue, second my fat and third my mid night snacking, funny enough I actually got over my main problem more easily than I got over the other two, It took me most of last year and very little into this year to get over my mid night snacking (honestly I still fall into that temptation once in a while) and my weight is a lot more stable now. This is what happens when we decide to keep running or hiding when we are faced with tough situations most times we end up with some solitary addictions, food, porn, drugs, sometimes we even keep so busy we don’t even have time to even know ourselves, and sometimes we just get so frigid we keep even those closest to us out of our lives.. It’s time to stop running away from issues that are hard and uncomfortable. It’s time to confront issues in your life.
Love always
Busayo Kehinde

LET GO!!!!!!

   Before now I was always quick to drop statements like “I have trust issues” or “I’m good in short term relationships” here’s why; at some point in my life someone I had trusted hurt me so I naturally decided not to trust again, I used to say I was meant for only short term relationships because every time I wanted long term we ended up splitting now when I talk of relationships I’m not just talking dating relationships of any kind, friendship et all even family I thought I was going to be with my family everyday forever, but fast forward to JS 1 I became a boarder; yet again another long-term relationship destroyed, I made friends in Junior school friends I hoped to keep forever but 3 years after I changed schools again yet another long term relationship ruined. So I taught myself I was only meant for short term relationships.
     It took me a while to realize something, those are not my default setting, I’m not meant for only short term relationships and I don’t have trust issues, the problem I hadn’t let go of those who betrayed my trust or those who left me after a short while even though I wanted them in my life, and because I hadn’t let go of them I still held on to bitterness towards them so I couldn’t see anything clearly I could only see through the eyes of the bitterness I felt and trust me bitterness clogs vision and so you look at the people in your life now and you can’t see them all you’ll see instead are the faces of the ones who have hurt you, being angry at people does that much to you and you don’t need that, you need to let go of those who have hurt you, maybe someone you loved hurt you, you have to let go, they didn’t hurt you because of you they didn’t know any better they were trying to figure life out just like you were, this life is that complicated and we all are just trying learning we’re not taught how to live before we start living we learn to live while we live and there is no guarantee that no one would bump into your living in their quest to figure out life,  but you have to let go, you need to drop the baggage you of hurt you have to let go the longer you hold on to hurt the more people you would unintentionally hurt, the more wonderful relationships you’ll miss out on, and you’ll be depriving the world of YOU, you are a total package of awesomeness, you’re the best you give life to the day, you give substance to light, you’re brightness. It doesn’t matter who’s done you bad let go!! Don’t deprive the world, don’t deprive your generation, and don’t deprive yourself of the greatness that is YOU!!!! LET GO!
LOVE ALWAYS
BUSAYO KEHINDE
N.B: I’m always a message away busayokehinde81@gmail.com and pls do leave a comment, your comments are like a silver lining to my sky, and it always runs to my creative bloc to rack it for more amazing write ups lol…….. smiles :D