ROCK BOTTOM

      The world has unraveled before me, my dreams all feel like light weight matter before me, all around me I see ash and smoke, I see all of my prayers request stare back at me, the days I never thought I’d ever see has come and gone, I’m living in the pain and hurt of it all, I’m looking around for those old friendships and love I’d built over the years but I can’t see them, I look out for the numbers I’d dial non-stop if they had trouble and I knew but I do not see them, I’m at a threshold of pain I never even knew existed. I’m at rock bottom.
     But not to fear, rock bottom is the perfect place of rebuilding, it’s the perfect place to start all over again, it’s the perfect place for healing, rock bottom is perfect in so many ways, so yes I may be bent and may have responded to the waging winds in ways like everyone else but one thing stands even at rock bottom nothing is broken, nothing is damaged or destroyed and my scars? My scars are a badge of honor, honor that at even at rock bottom I didn’t break. Yes I bruised but I didn’t break. Every step I take even at rock bottom is a victory dance in the making, my heart isn’t broken because my heart is only a muscle and muscles don’t break in the end as my heart fell to rock bottom the muscle was exercised and its stronger than it was before I fell, and this piece is a testimony waiting to be shared that even at the lowest the one thing I love to do wasn’t taken away from me “MY EXPRESSIONS”. in the end I have come to realize that ii was made for this kind of heavy lifting, I was made for the heavy lifting of building from rock bottom again, my heart was made in two parts; one part saint, one part warrior. And I am not ashamed that I’ve fallen to rock bottom because the warrior in me would build and my rock top would “outstand” the ones that already exist and this I know well and good.

Ps: this title Is inspired by one of the episodes of the series Gidi up and the piece inspires by a spoken work piece performed by Titi Sonuga (EKI) although I wrote it in my own way listening to her helped me build this up and sort through my feelings.