Happy Sunday my dear amazing readers I’m totally sorry I’ve
not been posting stuff like I ought to I really don’t have an excuse but I
trust my post for today would bless your life.
Its that time of
the month, it’s actually one of my hardest moment every month, I feel heavy,
fat, sick, irritable not to even talk of the pimples on my face, I’m really
hungry but the sigh and smell of food totally nauseates me, I want everybody
around me, and I don’t want anybody around me at the same time, the sights and
sound of people telling me sorry even doubles my pain, I want to have my bath
but I don’t want water to touch my body and no I’m not crazy it’s just that it’s
my time of the month, I don’t have control over my temper or emotions doctors
refer to it as PMS but for me it’s simply “my time in the month” my time of
frustrations, anger and plenty of conflicting emotions. It was Tola’s birthday
and I’d promised to go out with her but in my condition I couldn’t make it
again so I had to text her to inform her, much to my surprise few minutes after
I sent the text Tola was in my room going all mummy on me, taking care of me
and putting my space in order she even took the pains of going out to get food
for me, and even boiled water for me to have my bath, then it happened. As she
was pouring the water from the kettle a little spilled on the floor I didn’t
say anything then however after I had my
bath and came into the room I still met the water on the floor I got really
irritated and started nagging at her about how scruffy, childish and lazy she
was, how she couldn’t even keep a place together just after I finished yelling
at her I realized what I had done I HAD JUST PMS’D ON A FRIEND WHO HAD
ABANDONED HER BIRTHDAY OUTING TO STAY WITH ME but that was just a little thing
as compared with the hurt I saw on her face,
it was unlike anything I had ever
seen. In that moment I know I should have said I was sorry but my pride kept me
quiet or rather I felt we were friends we were going to sort out ourselves somehow.
She stayed with me for the rest of the day it was worse than I expected I’d
talk to her and she’ll answer like nothing happened so I thought it was over
and at night before she left I gave her the present I made for her-a beautiful
handmade wire work neck piece she was so thankful and left and we continued our
friendship normally and to me that was the end of it all. It was until one
morning two weeks after the incidence I went to her room to call her, I had a
bottle of water in my hand, I got there and she was not ready so I sat to wait
for her, while I waited I got thirsty so I opened my bottle of water to drink
as I was drinking it her roommate came in a hurry to pick something and as she was
walking through she hit me and a little water spilled on the floor and surprisingly
Tola did make a comment she was like if water pours on my floor she’s childish
and unorganized but when I the most organized madam pours it on her floor it’s
an accident. And for the first time I realized that she hadn’t forgotten and
she was still upset and I never said sorry to her.
it was unlike anything I had ever
seen. In that moment I know I should have said I was sorry but my pride kept me
quiet or rather I felt we were friends we were going to sort out ourselves somehow.
She stayed with me for the rest of the day it was worse than I expected I’d
talk to her and she’ll answer like nothing happened so I thought it was over
and at night before she left I gave her the present I made for her-a beautiful
handmade wire work neck piece she was so thankful and left and we continued our
friendship normally and to me that was the end of it all. It was until one
morning two weeks after the incidence I went to her room to call her, I had a
bottle of water in my hand, I got there and she was not ready so I sat to wait
for her, while I waited I got thirsty so I opened my bottle of water to drink
as I was drinking it her roommate came in a hurry to pick something and as she was
walking through she hit me and a little water spilled on the floor and surprisingly
Tola did make a comment she was like if water pours on my floor she’s childish
and unorganized but when I the most organized madam pours it on her floor it’s
an accident. And for the first time I realized that she hadn’t forgotten and
she was still upset and I never said sorry to her.
I know some of
you my dear readers can relate to this, it’s not only when you are PMSing, at
least boys don’t have PMS but they do it we value our alter ego than the people
in our lives, for me I didn’t realize how much closure the simple word sorry
can bring, there are a lot of times I’ve had disagreements with people and just
because I couldn’t say sorry malice erupted. Over time I hated saying sorry
first to any one because I felt it would look like I loved the person so much
and could not imagine offending them, other times I felt it would mean
admitting I’m wrong even though sometimes I’m not wrong.
 |
| and she cant even say sorry |
However the truth is saying sorry doesn’t reduce you in any
way, it only shows you’re strong, strong enough to take the first step, strong
enough to control your ego and apologize and not allow your ego to stop you
from making amends, it means you’re strong enough you’ve overcome pride enough
to come down and apologize, and like I always tell my friends when they have
issues with people, apologizing always makes you the better person.
I realized
something every time we offend someone we know weather of not their expressions
say it however we have two options; first is to apologize immediately or the
second is to pretend it didn’t happen and continue things normally. We need to
understand that none of the two options change what has happened, the first is
to bring closure to the issue i.e. end the issue, while the second is tantamount
to either postponing the closure or a lifelong malice. So what the point? The
first it the voice of humility (the voice of truth) the second is that of pride
(the voice that led Satan into hell) so like Joshua said in the bible I say in
my own words, choose today what you’ll do about issues you’ve left like that.
Have an amazing Sunday.
PS: I just had to add this quick note, I finished this write
up early hours but for some reasons I could not publish it before I went to
church and just as I got to church during Sunday school the topic was anger,
and most of the issues raised related to this article, plus I realized that my
topic was the right one. I was told that one of the world wars was as a result
of someone’s refusal to say sorry smh….it’s all good just thought y’all should
know.
Xoxo Busayo
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